By Maria Lubanovic, Copy Editor and Ceara Kelly, Contributor
This is our last official Oscars recap. It’s been a fun time, but we have to graduate and join the industry ourselves. This is our third annual recap, so if you want to see the previous ones, here are 2019’s and 2018’s.
We will keep it simple this year.
We could always talk about how there are not enough nominees of color and how last year’s best picture winner was a huge disappointment. But we’re not going to. We could also talk about how Greta Gerwig deserved at least a best director nomination for Little Women, or how Rocketman was snubbed for both costume design and production design.
Ceara could yell endlessly about how Pokémon Detective Pikachu should have had a visual effects award “because he was there!” Maria could also talk about her dislike of Marriage Story. But that’s not important. What is important is that the Oscars decided not to have a host again. Thank f*cking god.
Janelle Monae opens the show with her amazing voice and nods to films that came out this year. It’s pretty good, but some of the backup dancers are wearing Midsommar outfits, so it makes us think that they planned this far before any of the nominations were announced and had already paid for the costumes.
Chris Rock and Steve Martin kill their opener by talking about how they feel demoted and also by making comments about Jeff Bezos. Jeff Bezos looks as soulless as ever. I guess he is supposed to be there because Amazon is their own production company/streaming service/internet mogul and everything, but it feels strange.
Regina King is stunning as always. Everyone who is presenting looks incredible.
Animated feature: Toy Story 4
It’s no underdog and not much of a surprise. But at least in the future, no more animated features will have to go up against a Toy Story movie—so we say in 2020.
Animated short: Hair Love
A beautiful project that has been in the works since 2016. Representation matters, people!
Idina Menzel and a bunch of international Elsa voice actresses sing “Into the Unknown”, and it looks and sounds beautiful. The staging was great and bolstered by the electronic set.
Timothée Chalamet wears a fancy tracksuit because … of course he does.
Production design: Once Upon A Time In Hollywood
We love sticking a camera out of the window being called production design. The TV set they work on is pretty awesome, though, and the world feels real with a few magical, nostalgic touches.
Costume design: Little Women
At least it gets something. It’s deserving of it, too. The costumes feel lived-in, realistic and not too pretty. That’s a good thing—we promise.
Documentary feature: American Factory
Documentary short: Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone (If You’re a Girl)
Supporting actress: Laura Dern for Marriage Story
I mean, I guess if that film had to win anything, I’m glad it’s only for Laura Dern.
So why is Eminem here? I don’t know what is happening. People are really into it. I am being told that it’s a throwback to him not thinking he was going to win and then winning but he didn’t show up? I don’t know.
Sound editing: Ford vs. Ferrari
Oh my god, it wasn’t a war movie.
Sound mixing: 1917
There it is.
Cinematography: 1917 again.
No one is shocked. Its seamless appearance is an insane feat for both cinematography and editing.
Film editing: Ford vs. Ferrari
Makeup and hairstyling: Bombshell
Well, yeah. They made Roger Ailes look freaking gross, as he should. Remember, kids, even though Ailes went to Ohio University, that doesn’t mean he is a guy we should look to emulate.
International feature: Parasite
For the first time, a female conductor, Eímear Noone, conducts the original score part of the show. It took 92 years, and she was on for less than five minutes. It was cool and groundbreaking, but maybe, Oscars, do better? Let her do the whole shindig next year!
Original score: Joker
We love it when women composers win! There are so few of them, and they are all amazing.
Original song: “(I’m Gonna) Love Me Again” from Rocketman.
Yes! It’s what we deserve! Elton John is ready to cry, and I already am! Also, the fact that it’s the first time that Bernie Taupin and John have won anything together is very emotional. My heart soars for them.
Director: Bong Joon-Ho for Parasite.
Actor: Joaquin Phoenix for Joker
We get to hear another weird-sounding speech that has hidden good points. This time they’re talking about how fighting for human equality while kidnapping cows is hypocritical.
Best picture: Parasite
This is the first time a foreign film takes home the largest prize, and everyone is so thrilled for them! Bong Joon-Ho doesn’t give a speech this time, but one thing is certain. The man is ready to drink!
The lights turn off while they are trying to give their speech, but they come back on after everyone in the audience raises their arms. It’s a sweet moment.
Anyway, the Oscars left a really good taste in our mouths this year. It’s very cool to witness history happen in real-time and it makes us hopeful, but not too hopeful. Next year, a Green Book lookalike could happen again, which we won’t entertain.
But seriously, we enjoyed it this year. Maybe someday we will be in attendance—as seat fillers.