By Grace Koennecke, Managing Editor

Throughout my life, I have fallen in love with musicians who are not just good vocalists and performers, but good writers as well. For someone who writes constantly, I’m always looking for new inspiration and ways of storytelling that transcend, and to me, Soccer Mommy is an artist who has been doing this flawlessly since her 2018 debut album, Clean.

While I am a massive fan of that album, my love letter today is for Soccer Mommy’s third record, 2022’s Sometimes, Forever. An album centered around experimentation, lead singer Sophie Allison challenged herself immensely, working with acclaimed producer Daniel Lopatin (The Weeknd, Charli xcx) to discuss her own instances of romantic attraction, her relationship and darker thoughts about self-harm and depression. 

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When diving head-first into this album, there are extreme, psychedelic highs and desperate, concerning lows, making it quite the showcase for Allison’s songwriting abilities. There are also songs that see the singer genre-bending, moving away from the indie-rock sound found in previous tracks like “Your Dog” and “circle the drain.” And, of course, there are songs that truly see Allison return to her initial sound reminiscent of her two EPs, 2016’s Young Hearts and 2017’s Collection. 

The opening track is “Bones,” a song that Allison includes to create an open dialogue between herself and her listeners to talk about the insecurities that get in the way of her relationships with others. She sings, “I wanna know what’s wrong / With all of the ways I am / I’m trying to be someone / That you could love and understand / But I know that I’m not / I’m not, I’m not,” and this lyricism is so telling of how Allison views herself. She later admits to struggling with being open and confident, which in turn makes the song have a melancholy undertone that will later infiltrate some other songs on the record. In all, this song is one many can relate to in terms of the story Allison tells, as it’s quite relatable to feel invalid or lesser than in a loving relationship at times.

Even though Allison struggles to love herself while receiving love from others, there are really heartfelt moments on this album that she uses to prove that love is also addictive and satisfying. This is most heard on “With U” and “Shotgun,” two songs that discuss the little, mundane things that come with being intimate with someone. “With U” is a display of devotion from Soccer Mommy, as Allison sings about wanting to always be there for her partner, guitarist Julian Powell, even wanting to take on his pain and suffering.

She sings, “Your crystal eyes / Cut deep like a knife / They’re teaching me how to bleed / I’ll take the pain / Feel it every day / Just to have you look at me,” and you can tell through the song’s distorted sound that Allison has been in a committed relationship full of ups and downs for some time now. Thanks to Lopatin, its psychedelic production makes it feel like you’re swirling with the piano and drums that accompany Allison’s vocals, making it a track that one would not usually associate with the band.

“Shotgun” has elements found in previous Soccer Mommy albums, but it is arguably one of Allison’s most upbeat songs in terms of vocal delivery and production. Instead of resorting to just her guitar and voice, which is definitely a strength of hers, this song’s growling bass and frantic drumline elicit the feelings of falling fast and deep in love. I also just love the lyrics in this song because the chorus is easy to follow and extremely catchy: “So whenever you want me I’ll be around / I’m a bullet in a shotgun waiting to sound / Oh, yeah.” The song is also an homage to the little moments you remember in a relationship, which I think is more interesting to talk about in a love song than following a typical pattern of super dramatic, dense lyrics.

The darker undertone of the album is fully embraced on key tracks like “Unholy Affliction” and “Darkness Forever.” The first track uses a murky electric bass and industrial production, which is arguably one of the more experimental moments on Sometimes, Forever. Discussing her frustrations with the music industry and its demands, Allison opens up about not wanting to come across as inauthentic and unrelatable: “I don’t want the money / That fake kind of happy / I’d sink in the river / Before I let it have me.” In all, Allison wants to make music because it brings her joy, not because she wants to be commercially successful.

“Darkness Forever” is definitely the most disturbing in sound, intertwining dark allusions to writer Sylvia Plath to describe the mental exhaustion that comes with depression. Referencing Plath’s tragic death in the song, Allison feels lost in her own inner turmoil, wanting to rid herself of the concerning thoughts that plague her in her lowest moments. She sings, “Head in the oven / Didn’t sound so crazy / My brain was burning / Hot to the touch” and “It’s darkness forever / A cold sinking ocean / I want to feel the / Warm of release,” and this deeply personal track again highlights Soccer Mommy’s unique songwriting and the band’s ability to open up to their audience, even if it isn’t pretty.

Another track I thoroughly enjoy on this album is “newdemo,” an ethereal track centered around Allison’s disappointment towards society. It sees her lament about the disillusioned state of the world – “Hear the city roar / A creature that feeds behind closed doors / There’s nothing it needs / But money and greed / And a warm place to sleep – with the singer using the allusion of the Garden of Eden to symbolize her doubt about if there’s any good left in the world. This is most seen in the ending lines of the song, which are: “Sometimes I dream that the dam at the river / Will keep out the flooding of blue / But what is a dream but a hope you hold onto / A lie that you wish would come true.”

Almost not making it on the album was “Fire In The Driveway,” a song that Allison wrote to voice her discontent with Powell at one time in their relationship. One of the more stripped-down songs on the record, Allison places this song towards the end of the record to return to her signature production style, just her vocals and a guitar. Admitting to possibly wanting to end her relationship, it’s another very vulnerable moment on the record because Allison knows her thoughts could ruin everything: “And I know it’s the truth / I’m better off without you / But I can’t seem to say it to your face.” A heartbreaking admission of guilt and pain, this song is underrated because Allison is so forward with her thoughts.

Lastly, my favorite track by far on this album is “Feel It All The Time,” which sees Allison pull from some of her musical inspirations like Sheryl Crow. A country-folk track about needing to escape depressive thoughts, Allison uses swooning production typically found in country songs to sing about her beloved pickup truck. Her truck symbolizes freedom and tranquility, with the singer feeling most at peace when she drives. With the truck lasting for so many years, the lyricism reflects on how much the band has endured and possibly how much more it will be able to in the future. It ends on one of the most haunting yet beautiful lines on the whole album, “I got a truck out in the drive / And it made me a hundred thousand miles / And I don’t think I’ll ever make it so far / It makes me sad if I think too hard.” I think it’s an honest take on being a musician and the toll that selling yourself and your music takes to be successful.

Writing about this album three years after its initial release fills me with so much nostalgia and pride because it’s one of Soccer Mommy’s strongest records in recent years. There’s so much to unpack in just 11 songs, but Sophie Allison is someone who is never afraid to individualize each song to her audience, touching on many life experiences and themes that stay universal overtime. 

From relationship and mental health struggles to the thrilling highs and lows of love, Allison is a writer whose pen is skilled at creating relatable and emotional music, and Soccer Mommy as a whole is a band I will always respect and admire because of how well Allison’s writing fits in with their production and overall sound.

Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/album/3VXLdJpzeaAyX9Tbm0i0zn?si=myMb7gQtTBKSjC2i87fsFg&nd=1&dlsi=3ee1ef24b679479e